Twisted lessons
by Malammi
Summary: A rule makes it tough to be in Draco Malfoy's shoes, Snape can't help but notice and tries to help in his own way
1. Boggarts and Confessions

Title: Twisted Lessons

Beta: dracoontrapp - any mistakes you'll find are mine due to the changes.

Rating: NC-17

Pairing(s):Draco Malfoy/Severus Snape

Summary: A rule makes it tough to be in Draco Malfoy's shoes, Snape can't help but notice and tries to help in his own way

Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction set in the Harry Potter universe – all recognizable characters and settings are the property of J. K. Rowling and her associates. No copyright infringement is intended. No profit is made from this work. Please observe your local laws with regards to the age-limit and content of this work.

Warning(s):Slash sex, mentions of incest, adult language as the story unfolds

Author's Notes: Originally written in 2008 as an entry under my other name Slashy over at livejournal in the hp_rarities challenge. Fun times! :)

I've decided to give this story a face lift as I've changed my style of writing quite a bit over the years - I kept finding inconsistencies throughout that just drives me insane. Can't leave it like that.

It's set somewhere around the Halfblood prince timeline, I guess, I've made a couple of changes to make it fit this story.

That's it from me, oh and I do love reviews :)

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Malfoy had been sitting in the exact same spot all day long, pouting. Snape awarded him only with a sidelong glance as he passed by the boy. Wasn't he aware of the time?

His next class - in fact, the class that Snape held - was about to start, but Malfoy didn't make a move. Snape only grunted to himself, continuing to move forward.

As he walked with quick steps to the center of the room, he did his usual: stared at every student so menacingly that they had to look away sooner or later. Malfoy, however, always put up with good competition, but no such thing at the moment, since the one mentioned wasn't present. He couldn't believe how this matter affected him as much as it did. He did enjoy Malfoy's personality, the limitless supply the boy seemed to have of smart remarks never failed to make Snape's mouth quirk upwards, but in the end he was just a spoiled brat at the best of times. Why did he care that he looked troubled? Not to mention missing Potions. Before he could stop the thought, he felt his lips move on their own.

"Oh, you'll pay."

Longbottom looked up from where he was sitting. "Sir?"

Snape let his black, piercing eyes do the talking and watched Longbottom's trembling lips as his face returned to his Potions book.

"You're reading the wrong page, Longbottom." The disdain was as clear as ever and the boy answered his usual.

"Sorry, sir, my mistake."

"As always," Snape said, with a wave of his wand the book closed shut and opened again to the correct page with such force that it made Longbbottoms hair flutter. Snape sighed and turned on his heel.

Malfoy's usual minions got waved away. That was when Snape understood that something must have been bothering him. Sure, he had waved them off many times before, but not like this.

Snape frowned and made his way towards that white-blond hair, standing just close enough to be sure that Malfoy would be able to see his shoes. He cleared his throat since Malfoy didn't seem to notice his presence.

"Oh, bloody hell, Crabbe, wh-" Draco silenced as he looked up at his Head of House.

He studied the boy more closely as he looked up at him.

He had dark rings under his eyes. Lack of sleep, obviously, but there was something else; the expression on his face didn't belong there. Snape couldn't help but notice that Malfoy's bad habit had returned: his lower lip was pushed out in a pout just like a four-year-old's.

"You, come with me."

Those were the words that made him rise to his feet.

Snape led the way towards his quarters. Once inside, he locked the room and muttered a silencing spell.

His black eyes locked with deep, slightly angry, grey ones.

"So, Mister Malfoy, why are you sulking?"

"Just..."

"Yesssss?" He knew that drawing out the 's' always seemed to make the boy shiver slightly. This time was no different.

"Are you actually asking me how I'm doing, Professor?"

Snape looked like he had been kicked hard, and made an involuntary twitch with his mouth.

"No, I'm just asking you why you are giving me hell these days."

Instead of irritating his professor any more but answering back, he settled on looking slightly surprised. "I do what?"

"A garden gnome couldn't have stolen my Polyjuice Potion, transforming itself into you, now could it?"

"Professor?" A smile played at the boy's lips.

"I'm not joking. Unless a garden gnome did exactly that, would you mind explaining to me why your latest exams looked so atrocious? All these years, I corrected each and every one of them, not one looking like they do now."

"I...Um..."

Snape arched one eyebrow at his otherwise cocky student.

"Are you, in fact, speechless, Mr. Malfoy?"

"I haven't been sleeping well."

"And why is that?"

"Like you care!" He spat and fixed his gaze upon his professor defiantly.

"Oh, I do care, never doubt that. Your grades are dropping almost as low as Potter's."

"Are you comparing Potter's intelligence with a garden gnome's?"

"That is not important," he said in a harsher voice than he meant to.

He made sure to soften his voice before speaking again, though he didn't know why he bothered in the first place, "Why aren't you sleeping well? Maybe I can help?" Snape frowned when he saw the boy struggle, but lost the battle and a mocking laugh escaped his lips. "Do not laugh at me, Mr. Malfoy."

"I'm sorry! Just the whole thing with garden gnomes and Potter, Polyjuice potion...Hilarious really." Once he noticed Snape wasn't as amused he took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. "I have trouble sleeping because of nightmares... okay?"

Snape arched his eyebrow again, thinking that the face might make Malfoy speak, but as he feared, the words needed to be drawn out.

"Well? Nightmares about what?"

"I'd rather not..."

"I can force you, you know. If not by myself, I know plenty of spells that might be useful."

The Malfoy smirk was in its correct place as he said, "Oh, you wouldn't."

"No?" He moved closer to the boy.

"No. Because my father-" the boy silenced on his own, so used to having his father there for him. Now that he wasn't, things weren't going quite as well for Draco as they once did.

Playing on this matter, hoping to get the boy angry so that he would spit out his nightmares, Snape fought the urge to smile sneakily when he continued, "-Is in Azkaban, yes, I know."

"Don't... I don't want to talk about this, please just..."

Before he could finish, Snape flicked his wand towards the cabinet in the corner of his office which held the test of each of his students. It made an unmistakable rattle and Draco knew instantly what it was and it made him reluctantly move closer to Snape.

Boggarts... He took a few steps back. He never got the chance to see who or what his boggart was that time in class because of Potter's desperate need to be a drama queen.

The stupid fool took that boring class to an abrupt end just as it started to get interesting.

Silently, he had thanked Potter, really, for being the idiot that he was. He didn't want to display his fears to the others. Many things scared him, among those being squirrels, and he just couldn't live with himself if a squirrel jumped out as his boggart. He would be ridiculed, just like he ridiculed others if that one ever got out. So he didn't find out thanks to Potter, and he didn't want to find out now, either. He had a feeling his professor's sarcastic nature would have a blast if the boggart took the shape of a tiny squirrel.

Taking in the look on Snape's face however, Draco knew that he didn't have a chance getting out of here before his professor made his point.

His thoughts were interrupted by Snape's dry voice, "You know what this is, no?"

Draco sighed and nodded.

"Place yourself in front of me."

"I don't want to!" The childish tone of voice matched with his innocent face, but Snape knew better. Now annoyed beyond belief, he grabbed Draco's collar, pulling him close and placing him harshly next to himself.

"Puppy dog eyes won't work on me. Your mother might melt for the trick, but not me, so stop what you're trying to do. You're wasting your time, and mine."

"But...I don't...I'm not..."

"You're sounding like a child, stop this instant!"

"But..." He bit his lip hard.

Snape frowned at the sight of a scared Draco. He didn't look the way Snape had pictured him looking scared. The thought had thrilled him to no end in his daydreams whenever Draco had been particularly disrespectful although that rarely happened towards Snape, there had been times when the boy had lashed out at him. After those times he wouldn't mind having Draco as scared of him as Neville Longbottom was.

But this sight wasn't enjoyable at all. He sighed for letting the boy get under his skin, annoyed with himself for the first time in this conversation. He cleared his throat. "What's the problem, Mr. Malfoy? Obviously something is bothering you."

"It shows my boggart...What do you expect? Laughter?"

"Don't be scared, it can't hurt you, even if it could, I'm here. Now, let's begin." Without waiting for a reply, the doors flew open and a furious hooded figure turned up. Snape knew who this was even before the hood revealed its face: Lucius Malfoy. Snape knew that Lucius could be intimidating, sometimes vicious and very unpredictable, but Snape was truly surprised when he resulted in Lucius' only son's greatest fears. Draco inhaled sharply after inspecting the body up and down, clearly expecting his boggart to be something smaller than this. Taking a few stumbling steps back, his eyes fixed themselves on that oh-so familiar face.

"Father...I didn't..."

"The spell, Mr. Malfoy, out with it!" he barked like an order.

"I...I don't remember..." The tremor in his voice spoke for itself: he was terrified.

"Get a hold of yourself, boy! Just mock him, picture him looking ridiculous!" He pronounced the magic word on purpose to help him. He just wanted to find out why Draco was so scared of his own father.

"Riddikulus!" he screamed from the top of his lungs, pointing his wand towards his father. The almost royal-looking Lucius turned into a 50 year older version of himself, hunched back, using his infamous cane as support and wasn't at all intimidating.

Snape tried to block the smile that was close to being displayed on his lips before saying, "Well, well...look at good old Lucius, you'll always have that on him" he added as Draco tried to say something, but got cut off. "Now, talk." Snape used his 'don't argue with me, just do as I say' voice, which ended up with Draco shrugging while staring at him.

"Well, I don't know why..."

"People don't make excuses for one's fears, Mr. Malfoy."

"I wasn't, I just didn't realize that he was my boggart, that's all!" It was spoken softly as he looked at Snape at the same time he twisted his hands nervously.

"Since when?"

"Things got worse once the Dark Lord returned after the triwizard..."

"What things?"

"Instead of being just mean about my grades and his expectations of me being a Malfoy and all... He became more physical."

"Is he beating you?" Snape failed to hide his surprise at this thought, but frowned when Draco almost whined.

"No, he's just being an arse. He scares me a lot at home."

"And what happens when he does? Merlin, do I have to drag out every word from you? Words that I obviously want to hear?"

"He's...um..." Draco's eyes suddenly avoided Snape's.

"Well?" His patience almost shattering, he took a firm grip of Draco's chin, tilting his face up. Apparently once he figured that he had no place to run and hide unless he wanted to fall victim to one of Snape's spells, he sighed deeply, defeated.

"He's touching me, damn it! My own father! You happy?!" he spat. The angry tone didn't go well together with his now sad and confused grey eyes. "All right? Stop this."

Snape loosened his grip, trying to take in what the boy had just said.

"Not sure I wanted to hear that."

"You fucking asked!" Draco's voice had turned from an almost worrying calm to a high-pitched yell. Snape thanked the silencing spells he had cast on the room.

"Language, Mr. Malfoy," Snape said, almost with disdain. The word 'fucking' didn't match the boy's beautiful face. Snape opened one of his many books. Even though he found what he was searching for, he didn't speak for a few minutes, making the boy nervous and jumpy.

"What is it?"

"Silence!" The voice once again was harsher than he meant. "Just be silent, I'm reading." He looked up at his student that was looking just on the verge on saying sorry.

Snape shook his head at this, and Draco's lips went into a thin line out of pure self-control. Snape noticed the stamping of Draco's foot, but he didn't have the heart to tell him to stop that too, since his very body-language was so far off from what he was used to seeing from the boy. "Ah, here it is. Your father is preparing you for your first meeting with the Dark Lord."

"What you're telling me is just nonsense!" His voice unsteady with disappointment as he continued, "I've met the Dark Lord!"

"Yes, but you were too occupied thinking about your father's advice on what to say to the Dark Lord that you didn't study his face as closely as I did. Once he removed your hood, he hissed like a snake, did he not?"

"Um, I guess he did. I'm not sure."

"Oh, don't lie, I saw you get all tense, and for a moment you lost your concentration." He looked at the boy whose facial expression was twisted with impatience. "Him speaking in parseltongue is never a good sign. He's saying something he doesn't want anybody to know, not even the people he trusts most. What was obvious though was that he liked what he saw, Draco.'

The boy inhaled sharply at the sound of his given name used for the first time in this uncomfortable conversation with the Potions master more than at what the words implied.

'After that, he licked his lips slowly. That is even worse. You should consider yourself lucky he didn't do anything right on the spot."

Draco frowned, clearly confused and when he spoke next his voice nearly broke with panic. "What's any of this got to do with my father?"

"Think, Mr. Malfoy, or my statement about your latest test being taken by a garden gnome would fit once again."

"How dare you?"

Snape watched as the boy's pale cheeks turned red, and for a brief moment of lack of self-control, he found it cute.

"Dare what, Mr. Malfoy?" Snape said instead, toning down his words with a tired undertone that he sometimes used on whichever student had angered him at the moment.

"Insult and mock me while I'm in this...state?" He had lowered his voice a bit.

"Well, I know you're obviously not very happy about this situation, but it needs to be done, I assure you that. Let me tell you about the rule. I don't know why you haven't been informed about this, but for you to become a Death Eater at a very young age, your virginity needs to be sacrificed."

Draco's eyes went wide with shock. "What...I...How could he know that? What if I wasn't?"

Snape awarded him with pinching the bridge of his nose as he spoke, "Are you?"

"Yes!"

"Well, to answer your question- though it's not a good answer - he just knows." Draco grimaced and looked away as he thought that Snape was mocking him somehow. Clearing his throat, however, made Draco turn his full focus on Snape again. "Even if he couldn't, he would want to confirm it himself. Or let somebody who's reliable do it."

Kicking the end of the table with one foot, the pout returned.

"I still don't get what that has anything to do with my fa-"

"- Be quiet! Let me explain. Since you're as young as you are, the Dark Lord wants no innocent children in his army. Your innocence is only removed when your virginity is."

Draco was silent for almost five minutes, taking in what had just been said, Snape studying his face closely all the while.

"Why...Um..." Draco's blush deepened.

"Yes?" Snape asked, the word dripping with impatience. He just wasn't used to a stuttering Draco, a Draco who was barely able to form complete sentences. Though in his heart, he knew that the boy had a right to be upset.

"Why can't anybody else..."

"There were a few who volunteered, I assure you."

"Really? Who might that be?"

"You mean 'which ones'?"

"Yes! I got you the first time, there were a few, I'm not deaf!"

"Don't take that tone with me again. Well, Greyback was very eager, growling at you, but you were probably too involved in an inner dialogue, as involved then as you are now, that you didn't hear him." Snape frowned, sighed and gripped Draco's chin, making the boy focus. "You're not listening to me."

"Well, excuse me! It's a lot to take in!"

"As I was saying, Greyback growled in your direction." Draco shuddered and formed his mouth into a rather disgusted 'o'. And of course the Dark Lord himself, but many of them were holding back since your father was there. Lucius was very angry at the whole situation. He was clenching his fists all the way through. Once you left he said in front of everybody that you will not be touched by anyone else but him."

Draco grimaced but said nothing.

Snape gave him a few seconds to process before speaking again, trying in vain to choose his words carefully. "He didn't want the others to hurt you, as I'm sure they would do great damage." Of course he knew straight away this approach was wrong as Draco's eyes reduced to angry slits.

"Getting this from my father isn't damaging, you say?' He took a deep breath before looking up defiantly at Snape and added: 'I'd rather have the Dark Lord, thank you!"

"Foolish boy, you don't know what you're saying."

"Oh, I know perfectly well what I'm saying, Sev." Now it was Draco's turn to study Snape's face, he did it with increasing curiosity too since his professor looked at him like he had greatly insulted him. Although his black eyes showed no emotion, Draco knew that he was angry, he could tell from the older man's twitchy body language.

"Sev?" Snape said, almost disgusted.

Despite the seriousness of what they were discussing, or maybe because of it, he found himself fighting the urge to smile nervously as he continued: "Yes, that's short for Severus." Draco said matter-of-factly.

Snape couldn't help himself thinking that his name sounded very sweet coming from those lips, in that voice. Instead of encouraging the boy, he spat, "I know, Mr. Malfoy! But it's Professor to you. Only a few are allowed to call me by my first name, and lesser than that I let shorten it down to Sev, for that matter."

Draco snickered and straightened his tie that had been a little curled up after Snape grabbed him earlier. Practically tearing his gaze from the boy's small hands, he snapped, "What's so funny?" When Draco didn't answer, he pinned the suddenly frightened boy to the nearest wall.

"There is not much left of my patience, Mr. Malfoy. I thought that I might inform you of that if I do something stupid."

"Let me go!" Almost squirming out of his grip, Snape just took a firmer one around those wrists, waiting until Draco gave up his stubborn attempts.

"You don't want the Dark Lord taking your virginity, Draco. Trust me. You should feel the same contempt as you would feel if Greyback claimed you."

Draco blinked a few times, calming himself down, his lips trembling slightly as he brought himself to speak to his professor who had an almost bruising grip around his wrists.

He swallowed the whimper that was threateningly close to leaving his lips. "Well, I don't, I just don't want it to be my father! He doesn't seem to notice that he completely destroys what little we have together by doing this to me! Can't you..." He took deep, harsh breaths before adding the powerful sentence, "Can't you do it?"

He felt himself blush even deeper, hating himself for it. He tried to search his professor's face for any emotion whatsoever, but failed.


	2. Rules and Surprises

"Do you hear yourself, Mr. Malfoy? What on Earth would possess you to even utter such a thing?"

It didn't really surprise Snape since he knew that Malfoy Jr. could easily turn respect into somewhat of an obsession, but once he saw the boy's pleading eyes, he felt insecure as he released his grip of those delicate wrists. Would he fall for this? The boy was just so desperate to find somebody else than his father to do what had to be done.

On some level he did understand his student, given what he was left to choose from. Not being allowed to pick and chose the one he wanted at school... Snape suppressed a snort, of course that would make everything easy. This was what the Dark Lord was all about after all.

A different kind of torture, but torture nonetheless. Among the Death eaters there weren't many that would treat him right. He pondered everything while fighting the urge to storm out of the room.

"Draco...I'm..."

'Who makes up these stupid rules anyway?'

'You have to ask? He does. Just as he pleases.'

'So what you mean to say is that everyone more or less, unless them having a deranged father like me, had at one point sex with each other?'

'No, that's not what I'm saying. This rule applies to you and to you only. You heard him. He made it very clear it had to be done by somebody he trusted, therefore all your more suitable and natural choices at school falls out as you are very well aware of. You wouldn't be asking me to do this otherwise.'

Draco said nothing.

'This is how he has fun, you just can't argue with it unless you want to suffer horribly. He decides what ever he finds appropriate for each and every one.'

'Appropriate? I'm not into blokes last time I checked! Well, not...' He trailed off as Snape quirked an eyebrow in his direction. 'Why does it have to involve sex? Why can't it be with a girl, er woman?' He quickly corrected himself, there were no girls in Voldemort's army after all.

'You'll have to ask him.' If it had been any other student his answer would've been much different, he knew the boy didn't ask these questions that had already been answered because he wasn't listening, he did it simply because he was desperate.

'Can I ask you something?' He sat down in the closest chair never taking his eyes off his professor.

'Yes.'

'Why were you surprised when I told you about my father? I mean, you heard when he said that nobody but him would touch me?'

'I thought he'd...' Snape trailed off, how could he possibly tell the boy that he had hoped Lucius would take on the task and later ask him to do it? Draco raised his eyebrows and leaned back waiting for his answer. 'I thought he would be able to weasel his way out of it as he always does. Find another way.'

'Yeah, well...' Draco trailed off looking up at him with the same puppy dog eyes as before, but this time, it had an affect on Snape, though he didn't show it.

"Please?" The softly spoken word was almost inaudible, but he had heard it.

Snape simply stared at him, there was no point in letting Draco know just yet how much the thought of having him that close would please him. He settled on repeating:

"What you're asking is highly inappropriate, you do realize that?"

Draco got up and started to pace, frantically waving his hands as he spoke: "Yes, but you're the only one I can picture doing this. Besides if he approves of my father doing it, I'm sure he'll have no problem with you being the one who's..."

"How flattering!" Snape muttered dryly. Hearing the boy almost sob, he moved with stealth that was just so Snape that Draco didn't hear him. Placing his mouth next to Draco's ear, he hissed, "Your father would kill me."

Draco almost jumped in pure surprise, but found himself rather quickly, saying in an almost obnoxious voice, "Unless he doesn't want this, then I can't see why he should be angry at you at all. If he was, however, I would seriously consider changing my last name. It's either you or..."

"Do not set an ultimatum for me, Draco."

"Why do you care, anyway?"

"Of course I care. I wouldn't wish the Dark Lord in that way on anybody, not even my worst enemy."

"What..."

"Let's just say that when you get adjusted to him fucking you, he will do anything to keep you screaming. Is that something you want?" Snape sighed in relief as the boy's face turned even paler than it used to be.

"Um, no. But I don't want to scream in disgust, either."

"Neither do I."

Draco's eyes snapped up from the floor to once again meet Snape's black ones.

"You didn't just call me disgusting, did you, Professor?"

Snape found himself shaking his head because he hadn't meant it. How could he? The boy in front of him was his secret desire, but Snape also knew he couldn't have him for many reasons. Draco was simply too beautiful to even let his eyes dance over someone like himself. He would lose his job if it ever got out. His student, his best friend's son. He was a boy... Snape could go on forever, though he couldn't take his eyes from Draco's angelic face.

Well, he could if not for the cold grey eyes now observing him closely. Draco usually had that effect on him, he would be lost in his own head thinking about how truly beautiful he was, but something - usually thanks to Draco's mouth and toxic tongue - would take him back to his senses. Like now. Here he was, seconds ago just feeling sorry for him and actually considering saying yes out loud to end the anxiety that was written all over Draco's face. Now he was back to him rather dying than letting the self-absorbed brat know that he wanted him so badly.

"Well, did you?" Draco pressed on, blissfully unaware of what was going on in his professors head at that moment. If he knew, Snape was sure he would chose his words and attitude more carefully.

"You are my student, Draco, how do you..." but he stopped himself when he noticed Draco's hands. Without hesitation, he took a firm grip of the smaller hands to stop them from shaking. Snape shivered when he felt how soft and elegant they were, not for the first time thinking they were perfect hands for the beautiful art of potion-making.

He took a deep breath, but his eyes didn't want to look away. Instead, they fixed themselves on Draco's pouting, inviting lips. Only when he saw them move did he snap back to reality, the one where Draco was still holding him captive with those haunting eyes. They were just staring at each other for what felt like an eternity until Draco's angry eyes softened, looking just sad again.

"Look, would you just hold me?" His voice was trembling more than ever and he sounded exhausted. Snape feared that the boy would soon burst into tears. He knew Draco would never, ever ask anybody to hold him under normal circumstances, so he embraced the boy. He heard Draco inhale beneath him.

"You smell of potions, Professor...I like that."

Did Draco just purr at him? He let himself explore Draco by letting his nose drown in perfect, silken, almost white hair. He took in as much as he could of the scent, and he was lost for a minute. So this was what he smelled like? Like youth, some weird mixture of cinnamon and forest.

Snape couldn't remember the last time he picked up such a scent that was so powerful that it made him dizzy with desire. He knew this was dangerous; he was getting closer and closer to Draco like this. Something had to give or he would really be in for it.

Snape made an attempt to back away, afraid of his own feelings, but once he felt Draco tightening his grip, he just made sure to hold him closer.

"Please don't let go until I do..."

"I won't," he stated, cursing under his breath for his weakness.

"Please, will you do it?" he whispered pleadingly.

Snape tried again to move away because Draco's hot breath against his ear made his groin start to show its interest. Without letting Draco go, he tried with all his power to move his hard-on away from the boy. He was so busy doing that, he barely noticed himself saying, "I'll have to think about it."

Those words made Draco look up at him with a hopeful glitter in his eyes as a smile slowly became visible. "I said I'd have to think about it, it's not a yes." Snape added irritably.

"Well, it's not a no, either."

The sudden change of his voice and his insolent behavior showing itself again made Snape remove his arms from the boy, who nearly growled in disappointment. But at the moment Snape simply didn't care.

He just seemed so sure that Snape would indeed do this when it all came down to the matter. How could he...? Snape thought with panic slowly running through his veins. He couldn't possibly know about his feelings, One of Snape's traits was being hard to read, but he also knew the boy in front of him was a master at reading people, mainly to pick at their insecurities. "What makes you so sure?" he asked instead fixing his eyes on Draco's lips once again.

"Because you wouldn't let my father do this to me."

"And why is that, Draco? I would think that he'd treat you with care and be extremely gentle, more than I would be, I'm sure."

The boy snorted and looked everywhere but at Snape. "You're wrong. He's not gentle.'

The words sure did imply that something had went down that Draco was unwilling to share.

Before he could let his mind wander off, Draco continued: 'Besides, he's my father! It's disgusting! I would rather DIE than let him-"

"Draco! Enough!" The boy had bit his lip hard enough to make it bleed. "And why are you biting your lip so hard?" He added dryly as he wiped the blood away with his index fingert, clenching his jaw tight together, determined not to let the boy notice how much he had enjoyed it.

Draco, however, gasped and his eyes sparkled with mischief as he said, "Why didn't you just let me do it?"

"Because I know you. You would just leave it to drip. And I find it repulsive, that's all."

"Right. Just let it out: you wanted to see what my lips felt like, didn't you?"

"Enough..."

Ignoring the very tired tone of voice belonging to his professor, Draco continued, "Well, what did you think?" Making the man's mouth twitch once more as he tried to settle down the sudden anger reflecting in his face, his professor slowly moved around him in circles like a fucking vulture.

Draco couldn't help but feel exposed and trapped as his professor's robe brushed against his arm.

"Oh, do quiet down, Mr. Malfoy. You are confused. You should leave before this all gets out of hand."

Snape sighed when the boy just stood there staring at him. He sat down, sighing in his chair behind his desk and studied him instead of letting his anger get the better of him. The boy was nervous again, twisting his hands together. Snape knew that look, he was about to do something that made him nervous. He didn't need to think about that long though, in a matter of seconds after he closed his eyes, he felt a rather light weight on his lap.

Opening his eyes again, slightly startled, he said in a low dangerous voice, every word dark as poison, "Draco, remove yourself from my lap. Right now." But the boy just shifted in his lap, making himself more comfortable.

He was, for a second, very tempted to knock Draco down to the floor when he disobeyed. But once he felt those needy arms embracing him, he just couldn't bring himself to push the almost crying boy off.

A badly hidden sob was heard against his robe. Snape tensed, and first he didn't know what to do, but he hesitantly let his hand move up to Draco's hair, feeling the boy relax some. Knowing he was doing it right, he got bolder and cradled his head, letting his fingers play in baby-soft hair as he whispered in Draco's ear in a attempt to calm him, "Now hush, It's going to be all right...Shhh."

But Draco didn't calm down. In fact, he did the opposite, starting to tremble uncontrollably as Snape frowned, worried at what was yet to come, but he didn't care as he said, "Let it out, Draco, it's not healthy keeping feelings bottled up."

Draco took a few harsh breaths to make a last attempt at getting himself together. He didn't want to cry in front of Snape, a man he respected to no end. No, he didn't want to cry at all, but was helpless when he heard soft words and phrases being whispered. It reminded him of how his father used to comfort him when he was little. He could use it every now and then, as well...Instead now that voice was used mainly so that Draco wouldn't alert his mother. Draco felt the first tears tickling his cheek. Then, he broke.

He felt his face turn all hot because of the attempts he made at not talking in shaky, babyish tones, but he couldn't help it. He soon gave up trying to talk and surrendered to the tears. Slowly panic was getting a hold of him as he soon struggled to breathe, shoulders hurting from the tension that came with every almost brutal sob.

"Oh, Draco...Shhh." He continued stroking the boy's hair, but let his other hand trace soothing circles on his back.

Once he thought that he had calmed down, Snape's face went almost white when he couldn't hear him breathing, but sighed in relief when he felt the boy tense in his lap once again.

To Draco's horror, years of suppressed crying resulted in a heartbreaking noise of anger and pain.

Snape held a tighter grip around the boy, rocking him back and forth in his embrace. He put a charm on some napkins to come his way, gently tilting Draco's face up as he slowly wiped the tears away with the same caution he previously did with the blood.

He soon found it rather useless since Draco's cheeks, in a matter of seconds, were as wet as before. Snape secretly preferred doing this with his own hands, feeling wet skin against skin with nothing in between. He sighed because of the lack of comforting words. What could possibly comfort the boy with all this happening?

Snape nearly jumped when he heard Draco's voice from far away, "I...I'd..." Frustrated at not getting out what he wanted to say, he whimpered and leaned his head against Snape's shoulder.

"Silence..." The word that was usually barked out was now filled with care as he continued in the same soothing voice, "Don't talk until you calm down, Draco. You are just making it harder for yourself."

And for me, he silently added in his thoughts. He would never admit how much it made his stomach clench in anxiety while looking down at the crying boy sitting in his lap, holding onto Snape's robe like it depended on his life to stay put.

Tilting his face up again, he looked into those grey eyes, now cloudy and wet, still filling with tears. He felt himself blush.

The boy snuffled, and the next thing Snape knew, he had one pair of wet, soft lips pressed against his own.

He tasted salty from the tears, Snape thought, rather disturbed by thinking that this was the most erotic thing he'd ever experienced, since the boy was crying. He jumped a little - of course he did, the little devil had taken him completely by surprise.

But he wanted it. Merlin be damned, he wanted it.

He felt Draco's hands cupping his face. That was his wake up call; this was getting way more intense than he wished at that time.

The timing just wasn't right.

Before their tongues met, Snape reluctantly broke the kiss, pushing him off his lap, saying in a low husky voice, "Leave, Mr. Malfoy."

He removed the locking spell, but let the silencing one be if Draco decided to have one of his infamous tantrums. But nothing of the sort.

The boy just cleared his throat, made sure his clothing was in place, straightened the wrinkles in his robe, took his books under his arms, and left the room without even looking at his professor.


	3. Unwelcome news

Draco is slowly but surely crumbling under the pressure. If only he could control himself a bit better... really that would be better for everyone. Who knows who might be watching in the end?

**** Notes ****

So like I've mentioned, there are things that clearly differ both from books and films in this one. One crucial part of the half blood prince is going to be in there - eventually. It's just been postponed. :)

Among the things that differ:

Draco is as of now unmarked

Snape still is teaching Potions

Professor Slughorn is at Hogwarts but teaches Defence against the dark arts. So basically I just switched things up a bit. I hope you can look past those things and take this for what it is - a story ;)

Draco's emotions was all over the place, especially during Potions. Split in two at the war going on inside his head. He was ashamed over most of what had happened when they last spoke. Mainly the crying part.

The kissing however, had been one thing he was surprised to find he wasn't ashamed of.

Part of why he now was glaring at the other man was that he knew that the tight spot he now was in wasn't simply because the Dark Lord found it amusing as Snape had led on.

Why did he feel the need to not give things to him straight? Did Snape think of him as nothing but a child who wouldn't be able to take it? Take the fact that both he and his father was about to pay for that fiasco involving the prophecy and apparently for any other time the Dark Lord felt that Lucius had failed him?

Not to mention that he was also annoyed at himself for not mentioning it to Snape while they discussed everything the day before.

Draco knew how protective his father was of him, and things like that never passed the Dark Lord by. He only hoped this was as difficult for his father as it was for him; events however, made Draco doubt it. If his father had a hard time acting increasingly insane, he sure did seem to enjoy it.

He felt positively miserable as he sat right next to Crabbe and Goyle who acted like their biggest worry was if muffins was going to be part of dessert at dinner later. Never wishing he was somebody else before, the feeling quite alien to him he scowled as he could feel someone clearly had him in their line of vision. Sure enough, when he lifted his gaze, his eyes met those of Potter who was sitting there a few tables away, watching him. Quite shamelessly at that.

'What's the matter, Potter. The Potion too difficult for you?'

'Nope.'

Something about the way the prat looked at him infuriated Draco, of course everything about Potter infuriated him, but there was something close to smugness on the others lips. 'Eyes front then...' Draco muttered. But seconds went by and he could still feel those eyes watching him just as intently as before.

'What part of eyes front did you have trouble understanding, dimwit?'

Potter ignored this and turned to talk to Weasley.

A second pair of eyes watched him as well, and he snarled as he looked back at her. 'Pansy, usually "eyes front" indicates I do not wish to be gawked at.'

'But Potter's another...'

'It goes for everyone.' He rudely cut her off, minding Snape's back was turned to them in the front of the room. He didn't react.

'What's the matter? Something's changed about you. You seem... well, different.'

'You've noticed have you?'

Snape cleared his throat, Draco knew this was meant as a warning, but Pansy kept on going.

'Of course I notice. You can talk to me, you know.'

'It's nothing, I'm just tired.'

'No, that's not it.'

Draco sighed and rounded on her. 'Just leave me alone, would you?' Pansy just stared at him, opening and closing her mouth in disbelief. The expression of hurt and surprise morphed into an angry scowl as he added: 'Mind your own business.'

'Why is anyone other than me talking?' The cold voice of Snape showered over them. Draco faced him and shrugged and to his surprise was rewarded with a look Snape only reserved for the likes of Potter and his crew. 'The only reason for you to talk in this class is to either ask or answer questions, am I making myself clear?'

'Yes, sir.'

The class went on uneventful, and it was soon time for them all to show what they'd achieved.

Draco handed the potion over, as usual Snape looked at it and nodded in satisfaction. Draco expected some sign of regret from Snape's part for being down right rude to him, he was left standing there waiting in silence looking like a fool as none came.

Their fingers brushed as Snape took the vial, and instead of an apology he said: 'I think you already know this is a perfect example of the potion in question - one drop of it and we'd be all snoozing like babies.'

Draco started to smile but it didn't last long as his Professor clearly wasn't finished. 'However, just because you're good at a subject it doesn't give you the right to slack off and being arrogant in my class.'

Draco snatched his hand away from him and forced his mouth shut before saying anything stupid.

When the word ' pitiful' dripping with sarcasm was heard as Potter handed over what sorry excuse he'd ended up with, everything was all right in the world at the moment. Even though he was pissed and a little hurt over how Snape had decided to treat him today.

Once they were out of the classroom, Potter hurried his steps some to get a bit closer. Draco really wished he didn't. His fucked up potion was smeared all over his robes, and it was bringing a funky smell with him.

He didn't seem to care one bit about that though as Draco turned around. What met him was the beaming face of Harry Potter.

'That's the first time I've ever heard him round on you. What gives?'

'You would love to know, wouldn't you? At least I'm not someone he considers being daft and utterly hopeless.' Draco started walking.

''Touched a nerve did I?'

'You wish...'

Draco didn't need to look twice at the letter his eagle owl had dropped him at breakfast to know who it was from. It had his father's unmistakable clean handwriting all over it. He frowned. Since when did Azkaban allow their prisoners to send letters?

Moments later he knew why as Crabbe bellowed: 'Hey, look, your dad's out!'

Resisting the urge of hitting his friend over the head with it, he grabbed the paper from Crabbe with such force he nearly ripped it in two instead.

Sure enough, the words and pictures were all over 'The Daily Prophet', four pages to be exact.

A picture showing a very pleased Lucius Malfoy, finally out due to a technicality. Apparently a trusted source had said that 'the evidence had been tampered with. That spells had been cast on several of the culprits trying to get at the prophecy.'

Wizards who knew otherwise knew better, Lucius was as guilty as they could come but most of them knew that they would be preaching to deaf ears.

Draco was treated like a king because now his notorious father was back. Not that the students had bullied him, but he didn't have the same respect and fear as before. Every Slytherin was happy except for Draco.

In the Great Hall, him and Snape's eyes met. Several days had passed since their kiss, and neither of them had spoken to the other unless you counted the incident in Potions.

Draco suddenly felt dizzy while sitting down, before he made a fool of himself he harshly stood up and hurried out of the Great Hall.

His feet led him towards the Room of Requirement, he finally let out a breath he hadn't been aware of he'd been holding.

When the room decided to show itself, he didn't bother going in as he collapsed against the wall.

The only thing going through his head at that moment was what it would mean for him to have his father back out. He couldn't stop twisting his hands, confused by the mixed feelings.

He loved his father, and sure he had missed him, but then again, he had turned into something that didn't have the slightest resemblance to what he used to be. No matter how much Draco protested, there was no getting away from him when he was in that mood. And the way he said his name nowadays made him almost want to run and hide.

"Draco?" He spun around with his heart beating so hard it hurt, but relaxed a bit since it was only Snape. "I thought I might find you here. Though I expected you to be on the other side of these walls..."

And just like that, his anxiety peeked. Seeing the other man reminded him how small he'd felt last time they were alone, and he'd be damned to cry over how afraid his father being out of Azkaban actually made him. Naturally Draco chose something else to get off his chest.

Without further ado, his cheeks burned out of sudden anger as he cut his professor off, "Sneaking up on people are we?!" he spat in his usual arrogant tone of voice.

'Why didn't you just say that all of this is a way for The Dark Lord to get revenge on my father, and that he's dragging me right along with it? Why go on about it's how he amuses himself?'

'I didn't want to cause you-'

'-I'm not a child!'

'It's my life, I mean you could've been straight with me and not sugar-coat things! Nothing about this is OK! I don't think the line "He's getting revenge on your father, he's using you to get it" would cause me more harm than hearing the bastard "is doing it for fun!"

'You'll have to forgive me, I did what I thought to be best at the time being.'

But Draco barely heard him as he went on: 'And oh, how about telling me off like that in front of everybody? Twice no less!'

'Oh, come on. It's not like I gave you a detention.'

Draco crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, refusing to look at the other man, but he didn't fail from hearing the hint of amusement in his voice as he continued. 'Draco, I can't help but notice that you're angry.'

He couldn't believe his eyes as they took in his professor who was indeed looking slightly amused.

'Other than what we just discussed, have I wronged you somehow that I'm not aware of?'

'I think a better question is if I have wronged you!'

'Not at all.'

'Embarrassing me like that in front of, well everyone!'

'You know as well as I do I don't usually reprimand you for doing something questionable in my class or around me for that matter, but this-'

'-I only told two people to leave me alone, not my fault they didn't listen, is it? What was the big deal?'

'You were talking while I was talking, just like you are now. You know how much I detest being interrupted.'

There was a lengthy pause where Snape looked to be deep in thought and Draco stood watching him, fiddling with his hands hoping that he hadn't read The Daily Prophet just yet.

He decided to beat him to it, make sure he kept the conversation on track. 'So you did it because?'

'Because I had to. Your friends were listening. Friends that have parents that are Death eaters. I wouldn't want us to come off as too friendly and for that to reach the ears of the wrong person.'

'If you start reacting to little things you wouldn't normally care about, they'll end up suspicious don't you think?'

'I'll have to start somewhere.'

'But you've always treated me different than the rest. That's hardly news!'

'Yes, and that is part of the joy I find in teaching.'

Snape smiled, obviously trying to get him into a better mood, but he didn't succeed. Nothing short of a miracle could fix his crappy mood.

'What about all those times I've been pestering Potter openly?'

'That's different, everyone knows Potter and I don't see eye to eye. Speaking of eyes, we have a lot of them on us. Especially you. If you can handle the pressure. That's why, you will also from now on keep your temper under control. Low profile around other teachers, most importantly me. Do you understand?'

'Yes.'

'Now, I followed you up here for a reason. Interesting little piece in The Prophet, wasn't it?'

Draco inwardly swore and looked away, while Snape quirked one eyebrow and tilted his head slightly to the left, studying him.

'Little? He took up the entire midsection more like!' He suddenly snarled.

'If there's ever the need for you to talk, I trust you know where to find me..'

Having horrible flashbacks to where he was sitting in Snape's lap like a baby crying his eyes out assaulted him and he shook his head, determinedly. 'Unless you can help me with my problem we got nothing to talk about.'

Sure he regretted it, but it was too late. His professor's black eyes pierced right through him, not saying a word. Draco suddenly felt very little, but didn't look away.

They just stared at each other to the point he'd blushed out of pure inconvenience instead of anger, his voice stuttering as he continued, "I just...I didn't mean that...I need to be alone. I'm sorry."

"Certainly."

He turned on his heel and left without another word. 'Certainly'? What the hell was that? What did he mean by that?

Sure, it was a stupid move for him to send him away like that when all he wanted to do was talk, but Draco felt pressure on himself because time was running out. If he failed to get Snape to reconsider and say yes - he would lose his virginity to either his father or the Dark Lord.

Draco snorted, well, he was just working out wonders now behaving like he'd just done towards the only person who could help him, wasn't he? Snape wasn't easy to read at the best of times, and things weren't any different a few minutes ago. He couldn't possibly tell by looking at that face alone what he'd want.


	4. Conflict and Busybodies

Summary: Draco is hopeless, really he is.

Draco smothered his yawn of in-difference as Potions was about to start. It had been a long night where he'd gotten into a fight with Blaise over how he'd treated Pansy the other week. Really, Draco didn't think much of it - because it had been nothing. Even Pansy must know him better than that by now? His attitude was one of the things she liked about him after all.

But since they got up this morning, Blaise had been nothing but a git and apparently he was determined of staying a git during Potions too.

Snape wasn't going to teach them for the first of the two periods of Potions they had today for some reason, Draco could only take a wild guess as to why. Before he had any time to think about it more, the door flung up.

Instead of billowing black robes and quick steps that demanded attention and respect, there was a larger than life belly with buttons. Professor Slughorn.

A bit into the lesson, Draco frowned. 'Professor... we haven't covered this section yet.'

'You'll do just fine. Miss Granger here, has it all worked out. Apparently she managed to do so while cleverly doing a list over every useful potion that involves Essence of comfrey, which you are now going over with Professor Snape.'

'Good for her...' Draco muttered and bit back the rest of his reply.

'Maybe if you ask nicely she'll let you look it over?'

Draco, especially since he had no trouble hearing the Gryffindors snort a few tables away, forgot all about keeping a low profile around the teachers as Snape had advised him.

'I very well will not take notes from the likes of her!' Draco spat in outrage at Slughorn who gave him a questioning smile.

'What do you mean, the likes of her, Mr Malfoy? She's very well in the top of this year.'

'In-suffering, mudblooded know-it-all is what she is...' He mumbled low under his breath.

'What was that, boy?' Slughorn held his hand behind his ear, cupping it, looking ridiculous while at it.

'Nothing. I'll sort it out on my own thank you.'

'Finally, a lesson in Potions where I'm enjoying myself.' Came an amused voice from behind him to his left.

'Something on your mind, Scarhead?'

'What, me? Oh, no. It's just nice to see you be put in your place in a class where you usually show off.'

'I don't show off, thank you very much. It just happens I have a talent for Potions. In fact, maybe you should watch yourself Potter, might accidentally slip something into your pumpkin-juice one time or the other.'

'Malfoy, you sure it's wise to be threatening me when there's a teacher so close by? Remember the bouncing ferr...'

'Laugh it up, Boy who Can't be helped...'

'You sure you are ok, mate?' Blaise interrupted, his voice like silk.

'What's it to you? Afraid I'll leave a present in your juice too, Blaise?'

'Hardly. I'm only asking because, I hope everything's all right between us? That we still are friends you know? That's what friends do. Care, I mean. You really do seem different!'

Draco knew he was mimicking Pansy the week before where Snape had told him off. In his idiotic mind he must think that Draco would take the bait, blow a fuse and be told off twice.

Instead he just continued in the same calm voice: 'It's called growing up, Blaise. You should try it.'

And just like Pansy, Blaise didn't listen as he used words similar to hers again. 'Nope, that isn't it.'

'Enlighten me then, to what you think is my problem.'

In the background he could almost swear he could hear Weasley mutter under his breath; that he had many. He decided to ignore it and humor Blaise instead.

'It's just that I've seen that look many times you know, but I didn't expect to see it on your face.'

'What look?' Draco spat, staring at Slughorn who didn't seem to mind students talking in his class at all. Well, that might have to do with who was doing the talking he thought scornfully, last time he checked he wasn't on the man's list of favorites.

'You look like you are stressed out. But that would imply that you care about something, and that's just couldn't be, could it? I mean unless it's about yourself. So what is it?'

'You are awfully chatty today, aren't you, Blaise...' He just grumbled and uncharacteristically turned away from the other boy.

'Upcoming tests too stressful for you? Daddy being away left you feeling all alone?'

'I told you to shut up about my family. Besides, you should know everything about being stressed out, wouldn't you? I can hear you during the night you know, tossing and turning.'

'You forget I can hear you, too. Judging by the sounds, you're having the motherload of hellish-'

Draco slammed his fist on the table making two of the ingredients fall to the floor. 'That's enough!'

'That is quite enough, actually.' Slughorn said with a tired look in their direction.

But unlike Snape, he didn't dish out a nasty consequence following up their rudeness.

Blaise took this as a go ahead to continue once the voices of their fellow students could be heard around them.

'Why so touchy? A family that think they're above it all, shouldn't have trouble taking a few jibes.'

Draco clenched his jaws together. Blaise usually wasn't so talkative. But he figured, if he could be a bit out of sorts, Blaise could too.

Blaise made sure they had eye-contact before he continued: 'But I reckon, daddy dearest being in jail has somewhat put a damper to that image you have of being the perfect family, hasn't it?'

Draco bristled, but forced himself to remain calm. His patience was wearing very thin indeed.

His frustration kept growing as other students closer to them was clearly listening and awaited for them to continue their verbal-match.

Particularly three very nosy Gryffindors, even Granger didn't have the frenzied look on her face she had when she was concentrating hard to get everything just right.

He made a grimace and with much difficulty managed to focus on adding the last few ingredients to the sneezing potion they were being tested on in the end of class and carefully began to stir.

The instructions couldn't be more clear about that, stir the potion very carefully or you'd have an expl- there was a loud BANG echoing around the stone walls and Draco didn't need to look twice at who had caused the explosion - because he was sitting right next to him. Goyle coughed and wiped at his face with the paper-towels Draco had shoved into his hands.

'Pr...professor it really burns!'

'Oh, dear. I wonder why though, we haven't used any ingredients that might cause for it to...'

Goyle's continued howls of pain cut Slughorn's sentence short. 'Apparently you did, didn't you, boy? Well then, everything is going to be all right.' He moved fast for his bulk and was at Goyle's side hoisting him up into a standing position. 'Here, why don't you come with me.'

The silence was bordering on eerie as they all sat there listening as the steps of Goyle and Slughorn slowly faded into nothing.

'Never was much of a thinker that one, he's more of a doer, isn't that right, Draco?'

'And what are you, Blaise? Honestly, one would assume you simply just enjoy hearing yourself speak.'

'When I got something important to get off my chest, sure. Besides I wasn't done. You know what look I was talking about before?'

'What of it?' Draco hissed.

'It really just reminds me of a vulnerable little boy who's fighting to not rub at his eyes that are filled to the brim with tears.'

'My eyes aren't filled with tears, you ingrate!' Draco had to really put in an effort to keep his stirring under control. Nice and slow, counter clockwise, nice and slow. Easy does it.

'You always were daddy's little boy, though. You shouldn't feel ashamed of feeling a bit-'

Blaise didn't have time to continue, Draco wasn't particularly curious about how he intended to finish it either. He was finally fed up.

He couldn't care less about ruining what he knew was a perfectly good sneezing potion, nor of the impending detention he knew he was about to get. He had moved fast as lightening, knocking Blaise off from where he was sitting.

Chairs scraped across the floor as their classmates scrambled backwards all in unison trying to get a better view.

It wasn't long until they were tumbling around on the floor; Blaise with a split lip and already swollen eye, and Draco with a nose that spurted blood, hands tightly around Blaise's throat.  
They didn't hear some of the Slytherins sharp intake of breath close by, or the door that banged against the wall. But what they did hear was a furious voice belonging to Severus Snape.

'Mr Malfoy! Zabini, that's enough!'

Determined footsteps moved towards them, but neither stopped what they were currently doing. Before he knew it, Draco was dragged from the other boy, held tightly for a second or two before he felt the hem of his robe being clutched in one hand that refused to budge. He was harshly pushed down into a chair right at Snape's desk in front of the whole class, and Blaise was in the far corner of the room.

Draco's hands kept squeezing into fists at his side, wishing for nothing more than to pound that idiot into the ground, but one look at Snape and all he did was wipe at the never-ending stream of blood coming from his broken nose..

'Detention, the both of you! I can hardly believe this comes as a surprise, Zabini.' He added darkly at the boy who had the look of outrage over his haughty features.

Snape muttered a few words under his breath that Draco didn't catch, but it had soon became clear that he had summoned Draco's cauldron to where they were sitting.

As Draco had thought, his potion was now ruined. He couldn't care less though.

The class cleared out, Snape started towards the door, having Blaise almost in a headlock.

Draco couldn't help a small smile at that, but it vanished as he spotted Potter, Weasley and Granger, their behavior very obvious, tidying up their stations very slowly not wanting to miss anything that went on.

'Twenty points from Gryffindor for being busybodies it is, then. Go on, on with you. Nothing to see here.' Without looking back at him when he was almost out of the door, Snape hissed: 'You, however, you stay right where you are, Mr Malfoy.'

He made a grimace at the man's back, he summoned napkins and started to clean himself off the best he could.

Left alone in the gloomy classroom, it didn't take Draco long to found himself to be completely lost in his own mind.

Now that his father was back, he would most likely to be forced to return home during the holidays. His mother would be away to visit some cousins, his father had pointed out in the letter, Draco didn't need to read between the lines, or see his face to know that his father had been smirking contently as he'd wrote that letter. Especially when writing the part where his mother wouldn't be around for most of the last week.

That would leave Draco alone with his father for almost six days. Only thinking about it sent shivers up his spine. He didn't want to experience it. When all of this had started, Lucius had just been creeping Draco out, almost so bad that he'd called out to his mother. Thinking that the strange behavior was just confusion from his father, Draco hadn't given it much thought, thinking desperately that whatever problem was troubling his dad so much would work itself out. But things got worse. Much worse.

He could remember clearly how he'd found his father sitting at the side of his bed after that first meeting with the Dark Lord, with something that looked like adoration over his features while watching him.

When he had woken up from the curious sensation of a hand lazily tracing his arm, he had been pushed down onto his back. His father had then leaned in close, whispering in his ear that he only tried to help the situation along. Make things easier for him.

His mother had peeked through the door that time, confused asking what on earth Lucuis was doing. As always he talked his way out giving a convincing story of Draco having a nightmare. His lie rang even more true due to the cold sweat that had broken out all over Draco's body.

Draco was showering the first time Lucius did more than just touch.

Head all cloudy as he stood with his back towards the door, not hearing the door being unlocked. Strong arms held him for a second before he found himself being swirled around, pressed up hard against the wall by his father. He made Draco touch him until he spilled all over his hand that time.

A few days had passed until Draco found himself on his knees, his father's release swallowed, almost gagged up, but a hand over his mouth made sure everything stayed down. He cleared his throat out of pure reflex in the classroom that would be empty if not for his professor that had returned and was now eyeing him closely.

Completely oblivious to the fact that he wasn't alone his fingers clutched at the table harder as he could feel the weird and almost painful sensation as his moaning father slammed his dick deep down his throat, fingers boring into his hair. Draco had cried openly that time. It was by far the most humiliating and terrifying experience he'd ever had in his fifteen-year-old life. He couldn't breathe for Merlin's sake!

Draco remembered his father's eyes at that moment when he finally dared to look up. The slightest hint of regret dancing in the otherwise ice-cold grey eyes;

'I'm sorry, Draco, but this needs to be done. I'm only preparing you for...I'm trying to…' then he had silenced, shaking his head, and left the room, leaving his son in a trembling pile on the floor.

Lost in painful memories of the year that had passed since the Dark Lord returned, Draco was continuously unaware of the black eyes now watching him as he clenched onto the table with such force that his knuckles were white. He almost screamed as he felt the warmth from the yet unknown man, the strong arms around his waist, very similar in the way his father had held him. Hearing the locking and silencing spell cast upon the room, he felt the man's breath tickle his left ear as he spoke in a low voice, yet very audible, "Look at you, not thinking you're above it all taking orders, Mr. Malfoy."

Draco couldn't bring himself to answer properly so he just settled with a snort.

"You are terribly tense, you want me to fix that?" He was turned around, met with a smirk accompanied with an arched eyebrow. All he managed to do was stare at his professor.


	5. Detentions and Simple Truths

**This is a chapter in which Slytherin-traits aren't as appreciated, or are they?**

 **A chapter that lightly goes over the fact of if Snape involving a certain someone is a huge mistake or if it will turn out to be one of the better decisions?**

 **It is also a chapter where Snape and Draco get to know each other a bit better. Heh**

Without warning, his Professor's wand was pointed at him. 'Episkey,' Snape mumbled and Draco felt his messed up nose being fixed right up and sighed in relief.

'Not exactly following orders though, are you? That wasn't keeping a low profile.'

'What was I supposed to do, then? Just take Zabini's crap?'

'What you should've done was to wait until your teacher got back.'

'What good would it have done? Slughorn doesn't like me.'

'Oh, don't be ridiculous.' Snape was circling him now, with an interested gleam to his eyes. 'I hope you don't mind me asking, but what was going through your mind before I interrupted your daydreaming just now?'

'I do mind. Besides, it's a long story.'

'Zabini's detention isn't until tomorrow,' Snape took a seat right across from him and gave him a lopsided smile. 'I've got all the time in the world.'

'What? So you won't be having me do something idiotic or disgusting making me pay for what I just did?'

Snape shook his head: 'I got Blaise for those things, don't I?'

'So you just want to talk, then? It's not really a detention?'

'Oh, make no mistake. This is a detention. One I'm sure you'll find just as hard as if I were to have you sort out good snails from rotten ones.' Snape smiled at this even though it had now turned slightly more sadistic. He made a mental note to use something similar to that for punishing the next miscreant he thought worthy of such humiliation.

Draco returned the smile as he had no problem picturing Zabini scrunching up his nose at being forced to deal with the snails, a thing he most certainly would feel he was too good for to be doing. 'So what is supposed to be hard? Honestly, talking to you isn't all that unpleasant.'

'I haven't started yet.'

Snape sat there in silence, just observing how his student would react. Just like he predicted, it left the boy restless. 'You got somewhere to be?' He shook his head and looked at Snape slightly annoyed. 'What's supposed to be hard, Draco, is the topics in which I'd like to discuss with you today - I noticed you started acting out more after you learned that Lucius was out.' Draco opened his mouth to speak, but was waved off. 'Don't think I'm judging.'

'It's not just that… he sent me a letter.'

'A letter? You don't have it on you by any chance?¨

Draco's hand disappeared into the left pocket of his robe and he handed over a parchment - from the number of times it had been crumpled up in a slightly sweaty hand - it had clearly seen better days. Snape took it and gave it a quick read through.

'Good thing the holidays are more than a month away, then. I'm sure Dumbledore can help arrange something.'

'Are you insane?' Draco ignored the scowl on his Professor's face that kept increasing in annoyance by the second. 'You can't involve Dumbledore!'

'At some point I'll think I have to. In the meantime.… Stand up.'

Draco thought it was best to listen and not add annoyance to the many emotions on his Professor's face; an emotion that was never far away.

'Now face your cauldron. I'm about to put this detention to practical use.' Snape smiled at the apprehension crossing Draco's face. 'It's not a poison or anything remotely dangerous, relax. This is going to help you. I want to make it clear that you can trust me.'

'But I do trust you.' Draco replied surprised, looking at Snape as if he'd just been told he had three heads. Snape returned his look with an arched eyebrow.

'Really? Judging by how you looked at me just now you could've fooled me.  
That you trust someone should never be stated lightly, I'm sure you know that. Now, can you guess what the potion in your cauldron will end up as just by the ingredients I've listed and by looking at it?'

Draco read through the instructions and took and inspected what was in the cauldron in question. 'It's…it has a purple colored base…. I'm guessing it has some kind of calming effect?'

'Why are you guessing at all? Once finished it will indeed be a calming draught. How long do they usually need to sit before they can be safely consumed?'

'Depends what the base are made of, but with healing herbs like in this one not very long at all. A couple of hours should do it.'

'And if I wanted to whip one up for an instant use?'

'You'll just have to remove the Essence of Comfrey.'

'Why does that make a difference?'

'Because Essence of Comfrey makes the effect of the potion last longer.'

'Look at you. Why didn't you perform like this during your last exams?'

Draco scoffed and started to stir.

'I hope I can give you some peace of mind by letting you know that I will help you. No matter the risks, I will help you.'

Draco attempted to turn around where he stood but he was pressed up flush against Snape who gently guided him back facing the cauldron, one hand just above Draco's hip, while the other hand was busy trying to calm the boy's slightly unsteady one that was gripping the edge of the cauldron. 'Easy now, stir carefully. Wouldn't want a potion that's temperamental. I know you're grateful.'

Draco left his Professor a half hour later once the calming draught was ready to sit, he left the dungeons knowing he had to step up his game to keep track of what his Professor was up to. It wasn't a question if Snape was going to see Dumbledore, the question was when he was going to do it.

Snape had mentioned Dumbledore in the same sentence as the words "help" more than once during their talk, not to mention along with "before things escalate" What things? What things could possibly escalate?  
Draco couldn't even hold back the sarcasm in his thoughts. He pressed himself against the wall keeping himself hidden from view as a familiar mop of unruly black hair was standing only a few feet away apparently on his way to see the headmaster. Draco shook his head and frowned in annoyance. He'd bet almost everything he owned that Potter even could get away with coming there to visit unannounced. The frown turned into a pleased smile when Potter said 'Chocolate frog' in which the Gargoyle leapt aside, splitting the wall giving him access to Dumbledore's office.

Knowing the password surely was going to be a great help for his plan to succeed. He had to know what was being discussed with the old cook. Especially if it concerned him.

Draco had his chance as he skulked around, following Snape as dinnertime was officially over the next day. Apparently the password hadn't changed, and like that Snape was no longer in his sight. He waited a couple of minutes until he found himself standing just where his Professor just had stood and whispered 'Chocolate frog' for reasons he didn't know and rolled his eyes for good measure at the silly password.

He stared at the first sight that met him as the wall split, it was anything but silly, at some point he almost was unable to hold back the almost childlike enthusiasm as he was slowly ascending upwards towards Dumbledore's office.

His heart hammered in his chest as he stared at the door separating him from Snape and Dumbledore. Without much thought to it, he pressed his ear up against the door, really not expecting much, thinking Dumbledore probably had a spell to keep his chats private, but he was proven otherwise when he could hear every word.

'Yes, Severus. A letter.'

'May I ask when it arrived for Mr Malfoy and why it hasn't been delivered to him?'

'As of a few days ago – although regrettable – all post comes through me. Mind you, I do not read them, that would be plain rude. I simply scratch the surface if you will.'

Draco could hear Snape's snort without problem. 'Well, who sent it?'

'Lucius Malfoy.'

'What did you manage to catch skimming the letter?'

'He wished Draco to visit home come next weekend.'

'What are you planning to say?'

'I haven't really given it much thought.'

'With what little you do know you can't grant that. He's a known…'

'Oh, Severus. I don't have the authority to deny him this wish. What I can do however…'

Annoyed, Draco tried to hear as the Headmaster either whispered to Snape or he was showing him something. A sinking feeling of having been caught flooded him and he almost didn't dare to breathe, but he dismissed himself as being paranoid once Dumbledore started to speak again.

'I know very well what and who Lucius Malfoy is. I also know who Draco is. I do believe you noticed I skipped the what regarding the younger Malfoy?  
I hope that we together can help so that the word "what" will never be associated with Draco other than what a great wizard he is. I also am fair enough, although I do not know Draco as well as I'd like, to keep his mistakes at school separated from his father's. Speaking of schoolboy mistakes, I do believe we've got company.'

The words seemed to echo around the room where Draco stood on the other side, but he couldn't move, it was like his feet were frozen to the spot. That must've been Dumbledore's doing as he could swear he could see a Headmaster that was clearly trying to hide his smile once Snape opened the door.

'Mr Malfoy!' Snape made sure to let the boy know he was serious. He wouldn't show how vaguely amused this all made him. It was very Slytherin indeed and something a part of him had expected of the boy. But instead of letting all of that show he let his eyes bore into the slightly shocked face.

'Oh, come now, Severus. We were discussing him after all. Had I known you were outside I'd let you in.'

When Draco didn't reply but just succumbed to shrugging his shoulders, Snape nudged him annoyingly with an elbow. 'Speak when you're spoken too, don't add more rudeness to what you just did.'

'Severus, it's quite all right. Can't blame the boy for being curious. From what you've told me, you made it quite clear that you were going to visit me at some point, no? Instead we should say well done for not getting caught.'

'What gave me away?'

Dumbledore offered him a smile before he answered: 'I might tell you some other time.'

Draco was just about to reply when Snape snapped his fingers in front of his face demanding attention. 'What do you think you're doing? Weren't you ever taught that it was rude to eavesdrop?'

Before he could stop himself a sneer curled at his mouth 'Well, this is hardly eavesdropping, sir. I call it controlled overhearing.'

'Ha! How simply hilarious you are! What you might call it is of little importance.'

'Severus, don't be too harsh – a little curiosity….'

But Snape wasn't having it. 'What is of importance to you however, is that the consequence is the same for both. You follow me.'

Pushing Draco forward with a fist full of his school robe Snape allowed himself to enjoy the moment for once. It was quite the walk to get to his own study. As he was about to close the door to his office, he made sure it contained what his eyes wanted to see. A beautiful body, sinful lips, grey unforgiving, yet childlike eyes, and white blonde hair. His mouth a thin line as he gave the door a final push. 'What was the meaning of this, prey tell?'

Draco rounded on him, looking very much close to hysterics. 'He wants WHAT? My father wants what?!'

'Wants you to come home for two days, yes.' Snape released the rather tight grip his hand was still having of Draco's robes and stood back to watch him. 'It's times like these where I wonder if that man possesses x-ray vision. Dumbledore knew you were there before he called you out. He took great care to show me what he planned as an escape route for you because he was probably trying to lure you out of hiding.'

'Stop talking in that tone of voice, will you?'

'What tone?'

'Like you're speaking about the weather! You do realize this is just about my worst nightmare!'

'You won't be going there without any means of coming back here. Dumbledore will momentarily connect my fireplace with the one at the manor. I would think….' Snape suddenly stopped in mid-sentence. 'Draco, why are you sulking?'

'You went to Dumbledore just like I knew you would even though I specifically told you not to!'

'You told me?' Snape said slowly, his features darkening somewhat making Draco take a step backwards.

'I meant that I asked you not to.'

'Your answer came awfully quick, good for you. Being able to think on your feet is a trait that will most likely save you. I'm not surprised.'  
Snape leaned back against the wall, pinching the bridge of his nose looking very tired: 'You are impulsive, Draco,' he found himself nodding at his Professor's words, because they were true.

'You need to learn self-control, everything else you'll find is going to follow. By learning this, you have a much better chance of being one step ahead instead of just doing what you think might be right in the spur of the moment, taking your chances like you're prone to do now.'

'Because that sort of reckless behavior leaves you, more often than not to deal with consequences that can be rather unpleasant, I'm sure. However, mine aren't.'

Draco was suddenly aware that Snape had moved very stealthy and was right behind him – he could clearly feel his Professor's breath on the back of his neck and had to swallow hard not to show how much the tension affected him. The air was almost palpable. 'I'm sure they aren't.'

'You don't need to have an answer to everything. But answer me this; what have you learned from what you just overheard? That your father wants you back for the weekend. A thing we weren't going to be able to prepare properly for shouldn't I had spoken with Dumbledore. Isn't that right?'

'Yes. Floo-powder, then? What if I don't have any near me?'

'Oh, Draco… Surely you can use your Slytherin wit to outsmart your father long enough to get some.' Draco crossed his arms over his chest refusing to speak. 'Tell me what's going through your head.'

'Panic that's what!'

'We'll be here. Should things turn from bad to worse.  
If you don't feel you have the time to travel properly, just a quick peek with your head in that fireplace alerting me will be quite enough and we are there before you know it.'

'By "we" you mean you and-'

'—Dumbledore, yes. I can't appa—'

'—Apparate inside Hogwarts grounds.' Draco finished, rolling his eyes.

'You are quite right. All though I could've done without the rolling of your eyes.'

'I still can't believe you involved him without asking me.'

Snape lost his patience and got to his feet, with a sudden movement so fast with his wand that Draco barely had time to register that Snape had his wand out – the surface of the desk cleared up and Draco found himself on his back on top of it, momentarily unable to breathe due to the force Snape had used slamming him down.

'You listen to me! A Dark Lord on the warpath involves everybody. This is bigger than just you and your father, Draco. Although, now I'm sad to say, you are undeniably- alongside Potter - his favorite to torment at the moment.'

'Don't forget I'm risking my neck for doing this. I've had it. We do whatever I think is best. I've been at this a lot longer and I know when to ask for help when it's needed.'

'Why didn't you tell me then?' Draco suddenly spat as he regained his ability to breathe properly.

Draco made an attempt to get up but was almost brutally pushed back down as Snape hissed: 'Idiot boy, why do you think I've been trying to get you alone for the past few days? Completely oblivious, lost in your emotions.'

'Do you blame me?'

'Of course I'm not, that is what the calming draught is for. To better help you cope – you're not acting like yourself.'

Snape sighed as Draco obviously took this the wrong way: 'That's right, little crybaby Draco must be a very unnerving sight for you.'

'Stop it, I told you I don't blame you. All I want is to help you.'

'But what has Dumbledore got to do with—'

'—Professor Dumbledore, Draco, can provide help which nobody else can. I want for you to go to him. Confide however much you want. But I want you to do it.'

'Oh, yeah. Great! A man I hardly spoken five sentences to and this is the perfect timing for me to become chummy with him when I've got the Dark Lord breathing down my neck!'

'He knows more than you might think of the situation.'

'I don't want him to know anything.'

'What I say we do, we do. That's that. You should do well to listen to whatever I got to say since I'm doing you a favor.'

'Looks to me like you'll been doing yourself a favor too judging by what's pressing up against my leg.'

'I will not be spoken to like that.'

'Oh, come on Professor. Since when haven't we been able to joke around some?'

'This is no laughing matter.'

'I know that.'

Before Snape had the time to show him those lightening fast reflexes he was known for, Draco had seized the moment, urging Snape closer with his arms around his Professor's neck and he claimed the man's lips with his own with surprise much like he'd done the first time.

Snape smiled beside himself, even though he wanted to scold the boy he couldn't find it in him. Instead he punctuated each kiss with scattered words.  
'You are an infuriously stubborn, insolent, arrogant, and a foolish, foolish boy.'

It wasn't long until their kiss deepened, their little wicked dance growing in intensity almost as if they were fighting for dominance.  
Snape broke it off just to get some air and decided it was as good of a time as any: 'So are you going to listen to me? Will you talk to Dumbledore?'

Draco kissed him in answer, Snape sighed: 'Am I supposed to take that as a yes? That you will do it?'

Draco sneered and shrugged his shoulders. 'Maybe, haven't decided yet.'

Snape's hand dived into Draco's hair pulling it just enough to be uncomfortable. 'Such a wicked mouth on you…'

Encouraged by his students groping hands, Snape had started to kiss his way down Draco's throat, teeth scraping sensitive skin just above the collarbone. Draco let out a soft moan right next to Snape's ear that made the hair on his arms stand on end. His hand lightly fluttered over Draco's inner thigh as he pushed them further apart to make himself more space between them. It wasn't long until that hand made to undo the zipper of the boy's pants. Everything came to an abrupt stop.

Snape wasn't really surprised when his hand was pushed away. Draco jumped off of the table and took a step back from him shaking his head. 'I'm sorry… it's just too fast.'

'Draco…I'm aware it must feel very strange to be this intimate with me. But I'm trying to make things a bit easier for you for when the time comes.'

'Been speaking to my father, have you?'

'What?'

'That's what he keeps on telling me.'

'It pains me to say it, but he's right. But I do hope it being me saying the words and not your father that you would be so kind as to listen to me.'

Snape tilted his chin up, forcing their eyes to meet. 'It wouldn't do either of us good just to get this over with.'

Despite himself, Draco winced. Ï know….but can't we…. Take things slower? Not like he's set a date.'

'Before you know it, he can. And most possibly he will.'

'I know but until then can't we just enjoy it for what it is? I mean…let me….'

'That's quite alright, Draco. There's no need for incoherent babbling just yet.'  
He said softly, embraced him and gave the top of his head a kiss. Draco smiled against his robes. 'You know, it was obvious with the way you just shut off that what I just did took you back to a place where you don't wish to be.'

Draco's smile vanished and he felt the sudden need to get out of there. He made an attempt to push past the other man, but Snape stood his ground. 'At some point you have to tell me exactly what he has done to you. I'll need to know how to make things different.'

'Don't worry about that, sir. You already do things differently.' Draco straightened up, got down from the table and walked towards the door.

'And why's that?' Snape said to his back.

Draco turned around just as his hand closed around the doorknob. 'Simple. You listen when I tell you to stop.'

And just like that before Snape had a chance to answer, Draco was out of the door. He felt as though he had been punched in his gut at those final words and had to sit down to collect his thoughts. Part of him was happy over the fact that Draco hadn't waited for his answer. Honestly, he wouldn't know how to put a voice to his feelings, let alone words to them.


	6. What's on your mind?

**A chapter in which Lucius has been summoned by the Dark Lord and he has some explaining to do.**  
 **A chapter where more than memories are revealed.**

 **Chapter Notes**

 **Thank you for waiting patiently, it's been a rough couple of weeks.**

 **I know it's a chapter mostly of dialogue but I did that on purpose, there's a lot to come in this story, and to explain some I felt this needed to be done. Hopefully it's not a boring read. I want to give Lucius some "screen-time" in the story to not paint him as too one-dimensional.**  
 **Enjoy :)**

'Legilimens!'  
Lucius was unprepared facing the full force of the spell aimed at him, he was relieved the only thing the Dark Lord apparently wished to do now was to read his mind.

The twisted curl of the almost nonexistent lips told Lucius how little it would take for him to piss his master off. It wouldn't be Legilimens that would hit him, it would be the Cruciatus curse for sure. He didn't want to face that, but he also found himself unable to give up. There were certain parts he didn't want to share, not without a fight anyway.

'Well, I see someone have improved their Occlumency skills. To hide what I wonder?  
You know very well which tidbits I seek, do you not?'

Yes, Lucius did know very well what he was looking for. What he was hiding in the far back corners of his mind - the memories containing his son.  
He could feel his energy deteriorating and his knees threatened to give away under him.

As he gave everything in him to focus on keeping himself upright, away from the dirty floor, for a split-second he forgot to keep a lid on what he tried to conceal. His son on his back came visible before both sets of minds.

'Yes, yes, we're slowly getting there. Of course, I already know half of these little precious moments with your son, because I was there. Partially. Whispering in your ear.'

'I knew it! You've made me...'

But Voldemort ignored him. 'I figured you needed some help moving things along.'

'But how? The only one that you can manipulate through thoughts and dreams-'

'-Potter. Yes. I have to admit it took some work on my part, but I always get what I want. You having contact with my diary sure became an important part of it.'

'My lord?'

'Never you mind. The important thing is that I can make sure you won't lose your head when dealing with your son.'

'This is beneath you, my lord...'

He was offered a sneer that told him all he needed to know and he felt the alien sensation of his mind being probed further; Draco was sprawled out on his bed, Lucius was seen leaning in close to give a soft kiss upon a cheek of a boy who squirmed away.

'I do believe I'm making progress, wouldn't you agree, Lucius?' He added dryly.

Lucius finally fell to his knees, his attempts of keeping Voldemort out had given him a splitting migraine.  
Judging by the smug smile he received, he was aware of the pain it was causing.

Really, what had he been expecting when summoned? Praise?  
He had taken in his surroundings quickly once brought here out of old habit looking for a way out should he need it. What Voldemort had chosen was a remote house that had once been grand but now was ready to fall. Lucius couldn't call it a hideout because Voldemort wasn't hiding, he was biding his time.

Suddenly what brought him back to the present was a hand gripping his hair and a wand pressing against his jugular.

'I thought I told you to stop fighting me?' The fingers entangled in his hair released their grip. 'Oh, never mind, wand-point doesn't scare you all that much, does it, Lucius? I believe what scares you most of all is how much control I have over you. Effortlessly so, if I might add. Would you rather I focused this on your son?'

Voldemort's smile widened at the terrified father's frantic shake of his head. With the lightest of touch to Lucius forehead, he made his migraine ten times worse leaving the other man crying out, clutching at his head in desperation.

'Now, now, Lucius. You know what you need to do. You won't be able to resist me for much longer. If you continue to try, shortly these walls will be decorated with your brain.'

To his horror, Lucius felt everything crumbling down and everything came rushing back.  
There was his son in the shower, stubbornly trying to look away, but Lucius kept gripping his chin to guide his face back so that he wouldn't miss a second.

'Father, please stop this.'

'I wish it was that easy.'

'It can be! We can just-'

'-Hush, don't fight it.'

Even though his eyes was briefly closed as he enjoyed the sensations rushing through him having Draco touch him, Lucius was quick to cover his son's hand with his own. Without the need to look it was obvious Draco was fighting an impulse to flee, and Lucius wouldn't have that.

Instead of getting angry, he tried another approach as he took in the badly concealed panic on his son's face.  
'This doesn't need to be unpleasant, Draco. Let me return the favor.'

But like he'd anticipated Draco didn't take well to the words at all, 'Don't.' was the only word uttered but instead of moving away Draco's grip around him tightened. Only seconds passed before he repeated: 'Don't.'

'Very well. I will however touch any other part of you I'd like.'

'See?' Voldemort's voice hissed slowly close to his ear. 'This was all you. I didn't meddle in that one, all though I did peek around the curtain if you will. Quite an enjoyable little scene, Lucius.'

He couldn't hold back the wince as he watched his son, clearly uncomfortable in his own skin do as he was told.

'Enjoyable, but lacks a punch. Now, this one however...'

With a lazy wave with his wand he made the current memory fade into the next one almost like he was changing channels.  
That Voldemort had chosen this moment to replay itself didn't surprise him at all. He was known for wanting it all. A simple hand job, even though it had been causing Draco emotional pain wasn't enough for someone like him.

This had it all. Humiliation, tears, panic: One hand was clutched into a fist into his son's hair, the other had a steady grip behind his neck holding him in place as hips determinedly jerked forwards even as the boy gagged. Although he doubted he would have been able to stop if given the chance, he had regretted the way he treated his son that time, even during. It had felt like someone had been encouraging him, pushing all of his remorse out of the way - and now he knew why.

'A beautiful thing to behold, no? I'm quite proud of how I managed to influence you. Not nearly enough though, you held me back quite a bit.'

'Enough.' Lucius tried in a weak voice from his crouched position, closed his eyes remembering everything like it had been yesterday. Draco's gagging hadn't been from inexperience, it hadn't taken Lucius long to figure out that this wasn't Draco's first time using his mouth to pleasure someone.

Voldemort chuckled, Lucius looked up at him for a moment questioning until the answer came to him. Voldemort was still in his mind, not only fishing for memories, but fully capable of reading every thought he was currently having.  
'Yes, Lucius, such a naughty boy you've got. You sure he hasn't been browsing for someone else to help with his problem?'

'He's too proud.'

'For your and his sake I hope that you're right about that.  
Nobody else but you is going to do this. Should Draco or Merlin forbid, you do anything to help him - we all know you've got an unnatural attachment to the boy - the consequences will be dire. Am I making myself clear?'

Lucius cleared his throat, not quite trusting his voice 'Yes, my lord.'

'Now, where were we? Ah, yes...'

The final memory was how they had left it the last time they saw each other. A month before the ministry incident. Draco clutching his wand pointing it at Lucius chest with a mixture of disgust, fear and anger on his face as Lucius advanced on him stroking his erection through his bathrobe.

'-Please...'

'Please what?'

'Just ease up on the intensity of the feelings for him. Only for a little while. I don't want to hu-'

'You don't want to hurt him?' Lucius shook his head. 'Seeing all these tells me otherwise, even the one's that's all on you. You usually don't need much resistance from him to act like a brute.'

He straightened up then, suddenly angry 'You've poisoned my mind!'

'Only a coward tries to put the complete blame on someone else. We both know the truth: For me to be able to plant the seeds with such success, there had to be something for them to grow from, no? I simply helped you making the feelings you already had blossom in all of their glory.''

'That's not true! I did what needed to be done! I just didn't want any of the others or you to-'

'You didn't want me to what?'

The sentence was spoken with a voice so soft it was difficult to imagine the same someone being capable of murder and many times worse than that. 'How would you know how I'd treat him, hm?'

Lucius thought it better to keep his mouth shut.

'Ah, Lucius, Lucius, Lucius. What have all of this come to? However will you right this situation?'

'I never wished...'

'Rhetorical question. I intended to have Draco surrender his body willingly to whoever took on the task so that he later on won't have any troubles understanding that he now belongs to me. I never intended for it to be taken by force, until I had a glimpse of you two in that luxury bathroom of yours...That's when I saw the appeal. Your son hurts very prettily indeed.'

Lucius chin was tilted up with a skeletal-like index finger, done only so that he wouldn't miss the mad malicious gleam to the red eyes as he added: 'I guess you're going to rape him, then?'

'What, no! The first time... I don't know what came over me... I thought that it would make it a bit easier for him... With me acting like that.'

'Easier as to what?' Voldemort wasn't far away from laughing, and Lucius didn't blame him, it sounded ridiculous even to his own ears but he tried to explain it anyway.

'If me being gentle and coaxing pushed him into hysterics that I have witnessed before, I'd thought it would be better trying something else...So that he would be doing everything out of lack of a choice, so that he wouldn't need to question himself...that he wouldn't...'

'How very noble of you. Somehow I doubt your son will see it that way. I mean, he can't quite be in the same room alone with you without rightfully tremble, now can he?'

Lucius looked up for a brief moment expecting more to come, but Voldemort had his back turned to him inspecting something he held in his hands. He took a deep breath waiting for unbearable pain coming his way, when none came he averted his eyes back to the floor.

'From this moment on, you listen very carefully now; You've been very persistent in the way you've handled him so far, don't stop now. I believe the holidays should be a perfect time...' A few minutes went by where the only sounds that could be heard was the whoosh from Voldemort's robes as he paced in circles around Lucius who was still kneeling on the floor.  
'Yes, I want it do be done during the holidays.'

Lucius said nothing, just bowed his head lower. 'As for your request of me easing up some on the intensity of your feelings and desire for your son... Why would I mess with a winning concept? This way you'll get things done. Who knows? I might give astral projection a shot too. Given how easy it is to influence you I would have a blast.'

Lucius frowned, he had heard the term before of course but at the panic gripping at his chest he couldn't form complete sentences even in his head. 'Astral proj...'

Voldemort stepped back some almost bouncing on the balls of his feet like an overjoyed child at Christmas. 'Yes! Watch!'

Before Lucius could protest it felt like his mind had checked out, or his will more like - it felt very much like a different version of being under the Imperius curse. He heard Voldemort's voice clear as day asking him to strip and hand his robe over. He didn't question what was being said or asked of him until Voldemort decided to end it.

Once out of the trance-like state, Voldemort wasn't even close to him like he'd thought; he was standing across the room with his arms full of Lucius's clothes.

'Handy, hm? I could make you do anything I'd like. Imagine the possibilities. I might even kick things up a notch. I believe Draco is due for a visit home is he not? Make sure to welcome him.'

With a wink and a cold knowing smile he dismissed Lucius that found himself trying in vain to hold himself steady clutching at the door frame to the master bedroom of the manor. His clothes fell to his feet in a puddle on the floor, he absentmindedly picked them up and sank down on the bed.

Sure, of course he still wanted his son to come home, it had been far too long since he'd seen him. Mixed in with the paternal feelings were the ever present perverted ones now accompanied with a large amount of dread.  
Part of what made him great and so feared was that he was unpredictable.

He had no idea as to what Voldemort planned to do, if he intended to do anything at all.  
Hopefully it was just a way of fucking with his mind. Lucius had to admit if that was the case, it was royally working.

A cold shiver ran down his spine. If he ever questioned it, he now was painfully aware that he was a mere puppet and that Voldemort were pulling his strings as he pleased.


	7. Instructions and a peptalk

The last week Voldemort had haunted his dreams, that was why when his head seamed to echo of the hissing voice, Lucius wasn't surprised.  
He got so nervous that he for a moment forgot the manners his father had made sure to teach him that he first ignored to reply. Lucius could just picture Voldemort tilting his head slightly to the left at that.

 _ **'I'm here to let you have a first hand experience in what it feels like when I'm sharing your mind more or less. I, unlike you, do have manners.'**_

Lucius listened for his wife's footsteps, some indication of where she might be, he was relieved to hear after a second or two of intent listening that she was currently taking a bath upstairs. Lucius walked with unease towards the parlor and sank down in the sofa.

 _ **'Ah, yes, the magnificent Malfoy Manor, how I love it here.'**_

'Thank you, my lord,' Lucius tried in a shaky voice, glad Narcissa wasn't close by, to her it would sound like he was talking to himself. With a sinking feeling in his gut he guessed would only grow in intensity during this little show and tell, he finally dared to ask: 'Not that I'm not honored but I have to ask...'

 _ **'Yes?'**_

'What's...What's the meaning of this visit?'

 _ **'Funny you should ask, given we're only a little more than two hours away from when your son arrives.'**_

'Forgive me, what...'

 _ **'I'm simply here to give you a few instructions, that's all.'**_

Lucius tensed up, it had felt just as if someone had planted something sharp in his brain and was now slowly twisting the object.  
 _ **'I'm not hearing a reply, Lucius. Don't you want to hear the instructions I have for you?'**_

'Y-yes, my lord.'

 _ **'You are to give him a proper welcome. Before he goes back to Hogwarts I want him to willingly have taken you in his mouth.'** _ Voldemort chuckled at what had to be a bewildered expression on his face and continued even more amused: _**'Calm down. You may use what ever methods you feel necessary to achieve it. I'm not that difficult.'**_

'Methods?'

 _ **'Potions, spells, hexes if you will, I know you are imaginative, Lucius. Surely you can come up with something suiting.'**_

'But then what's the point?'

 _ **'The point? I want to see it without the tears this time. Is this a task you deem impossible?'**_

'My lord, I-'

 _ **'-If so, I would be honored to help.'**_

Lucius squeezed his trembling hands into fists in a sorry attempt to calm his nerves and not to speak what he truly wanted to say. Before he could stop his traitorous mind _**'You stay away from my son'**_ slipped out while his mouth said something else entirely: 'That won't be necessary, my lord.'

 _ **'Lucius, you seem to forget I'm inside your mind, it won't do you any good trying to hide anything from me. I will stay away from him if you succeed with the tasks you are given.'**_

'I understand.'

 _ **'Do you? Well then... I'm looking forward to the show you'll provide for me. I'll be seeing you later.'**_

Lucius tried in pure desperation to focus his thoughts on nothing but a brick wall, but of course it fell flat 'I really wish you-'

 _ **'Don't finish that. I can still make you do anything I like without you being aware of any of it. Keep that in mind.'**_

'Yes, my lord. I'll be seeing you later.'

When Voldemort left the depths of his mind, a relief so powerful washed over him that his knees gave out from under him forcing him back onto the couch.

Without further a due the hour had arrived - it was passing by much too quickly. Draco found himself sitting next to Snape's fireplace currently debating whether to really go through with his father's request or face the consequences, what ever they might be should he suddenly decide to refuse to go.

'Take your time. There's no need for you to go just yet.'

'I'm thinking about not going at all.'

'Understandable, but I don't think that would be a wise choice.'  
Snape took a seat next to him, and for a few moments there was nothing else to be heard than the crackling of the flames.

'Just hear him out. I realize you can't talk freely with your mother next to you, but you can with her close by. Use her as your safety net if you will. He doesn't have the nerve to try something if Narcissa is close by.'

'I don't want to find out if that's true or not.'

''It pains me that you've lost all the trust in a man you used to idolize.'

'You would've lost it too.'

'No doubt. You know I'd like nothing more than to come with you. But I can't for reasons that I'm sure are obvious.'  
Draco felt a hand squeezing his shoulder just in time when his breathing started to quicken. 'What I can d... Draco, look at me.'

The sentence was softly spoken but he knew it could just as quickly turn into annoyance if not obeyed, so he did what he was told earning a thankful smile from the other man. 'What?'

'I'm just glad you're not giving me a hard time like you otherwise would.'

'Believe it or not, I can get by without sarcasm thank you very mu-'

'Aha, you can, can you?'

'Very funny.'

'So I can't come with you, I'm sure we agree on that. What I can do, however, is give you some advise. Instead of getting stuck with the fear and hurt you now associate with your father, try channeling the boy we all know and some love to hate. The Draco that carries himself with pride, superiority clear on his face whenever he looks down on the ones he considers less... fortunate.'

The words did bring a hint of a smile and he knew that it pleased his professor to see it, the quick stroke his cheek got before Snape got to his feet wasn't necessary to prove that fact.  
Draco watched him pace around for a good long ten minutes, he knew the man well enough to see that "being worried" didn't quite cover it and that he wasn't to be disturbed.

He watched the man with fascination, he just knew there were plans forming in that brilliant mind.  
He was just about to speak when Snape held out his hand towards him, he took it and got to his feet.  
Draco made another attempt to speak, but Snape shook his head, index-finger against his lips.  
'It's time, you should go. Staying here prolonging it won't do you any good.'

Draco nodded, knowing it was true.  
His faked calmness shattered and he flung his arms in desperation around his professor's neck the second Snape held out the floo powder towards him.

'Hush, you'll do just fine. If anything were to happen you know what to do.'

Draco said nothing, just nodded against his professor's robe. He tried his damnedest not to let panic overwhelm him. Although he found even the thought ridiculous, the familiar fabric of Snape's robe soft against his cheek provided him comfort almost as much as the kiss to the top of his head did. He nodded again and took his share of powder into his own hand.

The moment from where he was at Snape's side to where he was standing in the fireplace was a blur, but there he was ready to send himself away.  
Just when he was about to say his intended destination Snape interrupted him. 'Draco...Wait.'

'What?'

Snape went over to his desk, pulled out one of the drawers - apparently he found what he was looking for and filled a medium-sized bottle with what looked suspiciously a lot like floo powder but Draco wasn't sure. Snape sealed the bottle and walked back to him in front of the fireplace. 'You should have this.'

'What is it?'

'Floo powder. In case you don't have any way to get to it while you're at home. I put it in that bottle in case you...'

'In case I have to get away in a hurry, it'll be enough with me shattering the bottle rather than tipping all of the powder into my hand.'

Snape winked at him and Draco felt perfectly calm for the time being as he smiled back at the man who knew just what to do in order to keep him feel as safe as he could without being there.  
'Malfoy Manor.'

Like that, Snape was gone from his view and as he traveled and got closer to where he was supposed to step out, his nerves came back tenfold.


	8. Homecoming

Chapter summary: A chapter in which Draco returns home, and gets more than his share of surprises

Draco brushed away the ash obsessively wishing he had used different means to travel. He simply didn't put it past his father to block everything in their home with the single intention of keeping him in there. Of course his father would know the fact that their fireplace was at the moment connected to Hogwarts - he took a rather shaky breath before he wandered down the hall towards the parlor where he could hear muffled sounds. It sounded to him almost as if his parents voices was miles away.

He was greeted warmly by his mother while his father stood a bit further back with what looked like a genuine smile on his face.

'Draco, you've been much missed, son.'

His mouth dried up and he felt his heart skip a beat when his father next asked him for a hug.

Draco thought he felt relaxed enough to be able to take regular breaths around his father by then, but a knock at the door that made him jump a mile told him otherwise. That he was nervous was an understatement.

The visitor didn't bring him much piece either, quite the opposite. A younger death eater, Nicholas was not more than ten years older than Draco was himself. He had always been eager to prove his worth and that automatically made him more unpredictable than most.

Draco took a step back, he never warmed up to Nicholas Rheinhardt.  
The man was good looking but very aware of it and was used to getting what ever he wanted. His father had told him loads of stories over the years about Rheinhardt that had made his skin crawl.

He remembered even when he was a little boy he used to take lengthy detours around the manor to avoid being seen when he paid them a visit. Draco had only caught a glimpse of the man over the years, where he was concerned that was quite enough.

'Nicholas, what brings you here?'

'Lucius, can't I just visit an old friend?'

'If you weren't invited you wouldn't have been able to make it through our gate.'

'Noted.'

Draco took a second step back when his father showed their guest in. Nicholas dropped his coat in the waiting arms of one of the family's many house-elves before he greeted his father with a handshake. He was about to say something before he trailed off when his eyes landed on Draco who tried his hardest to remain in the back.

'Merlin all mighty... Last time I had a real good look at you, the room was quite dark. Yet, my eyes didn't fool me. Handsome young man, indeed.'

Draco was used to getting compliments but not like that and not from grown up men. He straightened himself up nonetheless, hellbent on behaving like he was supposed to when he was at home. 'Err... Thank you, sir.'

Draco quickly stole a glance at his parents checking to see their reactions to his uncharacteristic 'err', truth be told, that was how someone like Potter would start a sentence - but his mother seemed pleased, and his father was frowning but not in his direction, but at their guest.

'Shall we?' His father wasn't asking a question, he was insisting as he showed Nicholas further inside towards their dining room. 'I believe dinner is about to be served shortly.'

Sure enough, only minutes went by from when they took their seats at the dinner-table, to when the house-elves started to serve a magnificent meal.

Draco didn't need to look up, he was fully aware of that he had two sets of eyes on him. Sure enough, when he finally looked up, Nicholas was eyeballing him with an annoying little smile Draco couldn't read, while his father looked to be deep in his thoughts. Unlike so many details before it, this one wasn't lost on his mother.

'Lucius, darling...'

Only a 'hmph' was heard, eyes never leaving Draco. Narcissa cleared her throat and gave him a shove.'For Merlin's sake, let the boy relax. You're staring.'

'You're right. Forgive me.'

'You are both staring.'

'I can only repeat what dear Lucius just said I'm afraid, Narcissa. You're right, forgive me. Can you blame me though? A camera would just eat Draco up.'

'You know in the wizarding world that can truly happen.'  
He'd said it before he could stop himself, he hadn't meant to be funny and he almost cursed as the other man's rumbling laughter echoed around the room, he seriously disliked this man.

He forced a smile and took another sip of water before he replied; 'Thank you, sir.'

'Thank me for what? If you're interested I have connections that would love to take you on as a model. I believe they are currently looking for a handsome young man such as yourself that can show off new sets of racing-brooms. You know, to trigger "I need that broom to succeed-'way of thinking. Eventually this leads to the parents feeling like they would let their child down by not buying it.'

Draco stared at the man, his mouth partially open. Really, was he for real? Part of him was tempted, sure, who wouldn't be. Just to imagine the look on everyone's face in school if he were to become famous would all be worth it.

His mother interrupted his daydreaming just when he was about to get to what Potter's reaction would most likely to be. 'Don't be silly, Nicholas. Draco has quite enough to deal with in school as it is. I won't be having him dragging himself and his grades down thanks to a simple photo-session.'

'That's a shame.'

The dinner went by peacefully, up until it was time for dessert. Draco was halfway done through his second helping of rhubarb-pie with custard when he felt something trickling down his chin, surprised as he wasn't a sloppy eater he took his napkin to wipe the custard off but was dumbfounded when the sticky, sweet vanilla custard stayed right where it was.

'What the-'

'What's going on?' His mother stood up and got to his side, while his father stayed right where he was staring at Nicholas with murder in his eyes. Nicholas however, just smiled and nodded. 'Just as I pictured. Perfect.'

'End it, you fool.' His father snarled.

'Not to fear, not to fear. It was meant as a joke.'

'What can possibly be found funny about having custard running down his chin?'

'Narcissa, forgive me, but I didn't peg you to be a prude.'

Right then, his father slammed his palm in the table making everything in close proximity jump. 'That's enough! End that atrocious spell and follow me!'

Nicholas grinned, snapped his fingers and Draco's face was clean once again. His mother's hand covered his own when it tried to travel to his chin with his crumpled up napkin for what had to be the tenth time.

They sat there in silence until a loud bang was heard, followed by a thud characteristic of that of a body hitting the floor.  
His father's voice was heard loud and clear, telling the other man that he'd be damned before letting his wife and son be treated like that in his own home.

Draco couldn't help his curiosity, despite his mother's protests he moved closer to the room where his father and their so called friend was just in time when they had lowered their voices.

'-You might think my wife is a prude, dear old friend, but I'm not. I can spot type's of the likes of you by a hundred miles - especially when my son is the target. So I ask you again, it's crucial for how you leave the manor how truthful you'll be with me - what brings you here?'

'The dark lord.'

'What has he got to do with you playing tricks on my son?'

'He told me to.'

'Why?'

Silence.

It didn't take long before he heard screaming, earsplitting screaming. Draco could only take a wild guess as to what nasty spell his father had cast.

'All right, let's try this again, shall we? Why?'

'To test you. How you'd react. How far I could take it.'

'Really? Interesting. And just out of curiosity, what would be your next step?'

'I...'

'Answer me.'

'I were to get him alone and... I was told to try to seduce him.'

'Really? Get him all riled up for some custard on his face so he'd run to the bathroom to get if off? I would probably tell you to go after him to end the spell...and you would try to have your way with him?'

'Something like that, yes.'

'What makes you think he would be so easily swayed?'

'The dark lord, he told me young Draco was quite desperate to find someone else to take care of what have been demanded of him...I was there that evening.'

'I know you were...Quite eager too if I remember correctly.'

'Lucius, I-'

'Since you were there, you also know how it all ended, no? I told everyone loud and clear that nobody were to touch Draco but me.'

'Lucius, I was told to test you. He doubted if you really meant it or if it was just something you said in the heat of the moment.'

'He doubts me, you say? Anything else?'

'He wanted to have a look first hand of how much you meant what you said. That if you really consider him to be yours for the taking.'

Out in the hall, Draco winced and held his breath waiting for his father to answer the man.

'Colorful way of putting it. But yes, he is mine. I have my own plans for him.' Draco let his breath out, it hitched on its way back in and for a horrible moment he thought they'd heard him. He knew that wasn't the case when Lucius continued; 'Plans I'd rather not share and I definitely don't want any more interruptions as ridiculously transparent as this one again during the weekend. You can tell him that.'

By now, Draco was swaying on his feet. He knew this didn't bode well for their guest, and he was proven right when his father spoke again, his voice had a dark edge to it.

'In fact...You can return to The Dark lord, - crawl back to him rather - and tell him I can handle everything fine on my own.'

'Crawl, Lucius?'

Draco heard bones break, more screams, a spell he didn't recognize being cast, and Nicholas was gone.  
Draco hurried back to take a seat opposite his mother only to change his mind when he was halfway there.

'Draco, honey, don't mind your father. You know how very protective he is of his family. Sit down.'

He shook his head and instead he turned on his heel, hurried upstairs to the safety of his room despite his mother trying to call him back.

He slammed his door shut and let himself fall onto his back on his bed and closed his eyes, trying to take in everything that had happened in the short time he'd been home. But it was pointless, everything else was a blur compared to what his father had said. He had plans for him, plans he'd rather not share. No more interruptions...

Draco wasn't an idiot, of course he knew the Dark lord had him on his radar, but this was all too much. How much exactly was he aware of?

He forgot all about that when he heard steps coming towards his door, when he listened more closely he heard his mother's voice. 'Lucius, leave him be, he'll come out when he's ready. His pride is probably a bit wounded.  
You know how vain our boy can be.'

Usually a comment like that no matter how true and them sharing a laugh over it would piss him off; now he sighed in relief since the footsteps was now walking away from his room instead of towards it.

Somewhere along all of his thoughts he must've dosed off, because it was significantly darker outside his window when he next opened his eyes. Confused at first to what had woken him up, he soon got his answer when a light knocking came to his attention. Surely his mother. His father didn't knock.

'Yes?'

'Can I come in, darling?'

'Of course, mother.'

'I just wanted to check on you. Are you feeling all right?'

'Yes, I'm fine, I just fell a sleep.'

She smiled, 'Oh, yes it was quite the little welcome home party you got.'

She snapped her fingers and Grumpy, one of the house-elves Draco had named as a kid came in with a tray. On it was a piece of rhubarb pie with custard and next to it a glass of pumpkin juice.

'You never got the chance to finish your favorite dessert because of that stupid man.'

He smiled appreciatively at her, taking the tray from Grumpy. 'Always one step ahead of me, aren't you, mother?'

She sat down at the far corner of his bed and smoothed out the crumpled blanket from when he'd been sleeping.  
'It pleases me to see you have more appetite than when I last saw you.'

He nodded and returned the smile.

'You know, I couldn't help but to tell your father that you had heard most of what had happened with Nicholas. He felt bad for scaring you and prepared this little treat.  
Say what you will about that man, but he sure does have a soft spot for his little Dragon.'

Draco suddenly felt sick, hearing nothing else but the words spoken by his father earlier.

Convinced something had been added to his dessert or drink he did what he could, which was spitting out the large gulp of juice he'd just taken back into the glass. He had meant to put the tray away on the nightstand but his trembling hands made it impossible to hold it steady and before he knew it, he'd tipped it over all over his bed.

'Oh, honey, what's wrong?'

'I want to be left alone for a while mother.'

'But, Draco, are you-'

'-Please, just leave.'

'Take care of the mess.' She hissed down at Grumpy, which he did very efficiently, during that time Narcissa's worried eyes never left Draco. 'Let me know if you need anything. All right, sweetheart?'

He nodded and dismissively waved them both off.  
They left the room without a word.

Finally alone he grabbed the closest thing to a bag he could find and threw up. Judging on how he began to feel kind of strange told him it was too late to be able to do anything about it.


End file.
